Please.

I just got home from school and I really, really feel bad.

I'll just tell you the story how current happenings have come to be. Several days ago, we were to pass 18 programs and we were all cramming because t'was a really busy week already.

Back then I was in a group of friends with 6 members including me. 3 of my friends went to one of my friend's house to do the programs overnight. All of us has barely slept at all and we were still to go to school early, like 10 a.m.

But there were only 4 of us (Me, Angel, Joy, Rich) who decided to go to school at the said time. Once at the school, we studied and compared our programs because our professor said that our midterm examinations will take place that day. After some hours later, the remaining 2 of the group (Cath, Pearl) came, and with almost no sleep at all, I think it became really hard for them to study, and print out our screen displays, while trying to stay awake. And they were really in a bad mood. Joy and Rich wanted to go with them to print our displays but Cath didn't even talk to them and Pearl insisted that they could do it by themselves.

That was the start of everything sad happening right now. No one wants to say sorry because no one thinks it's their fault. We really, really, miss Cath and Pearl but we couldn't just ignore that they seem to have found a different group now. I could sense everybody's longing when we see each other in the hallway. I was not directly responsible for the argument but I think I do have something to do with it, after all they're my bestfriends.

I just want to say I'm sorry. I could have said something back then when the tension was still starting but I didn't. I watched instead, watched as our friendship fall apart, all the while trusting that the tension would pass and we would still be OK afterwards. But we are not and now we couldn't put things back as they were. I'm really, really sorry that it came out like this. It wasn't even a fight! Just a misunderstanding, wasn't it? Now some of us aren't even talking to each other. I want to think that we could really fix this but I'm losing hope. Some seem to talk behind each other's backs and I don't want to believe that.

I really want our friendship to last! Guys, I really, really miss our group. I know all of us are sorry, please don't let our pride keep us away from each other. You're really my sisters and I like our friendship to endure more than that. I just feel really bad.

What Makes Me Watch Gossip Girl

Is it just me or is Ed Westwick unjustifiably HOT? D*mn. Oh yeah. I really, really, LOVE his character Chuck Bass on Gossip Girl. ;) LOL, it's been a long time since I've been here. And I missed blogging!

I've had 5 hours of sleep and first thing I did waking up was go to fuckyeahedwestwick.tumblr and satisfy my longing for Chuck. Season 3's not until September! Will Chuck Bass be a good boy for life? I hope so. I SUPER love Chuck and Blair together.

What really makes me watch Gossip Girl? I think I watch it because I love how Chuck badly wants to make Blair happy, even when in doing so, he might be hurting himself in the process. Maybe he WAS a coward, but he found the courage to tell Blair eventually, which made his confession the most awaited of all. I love how Chuck can't be away from Blair. And how they find each other no matter who they're with, where they are, and what they're doing. I love how Chuck and Blair tried to go out with people who only made them want to go back to each other. And how they know each other's worst deed and darkest thoughts but still stand by each other just waiting. Ultimately, I love how they love each other. They may have different ways of doing it but they try to understand. ♥

Yeah, that kind of love. :)

Yeah, baby, yeah!

Hey, it's me. Again. We'll talk about my trip to Bulacan yesterday. It was Kurt Samuel's 1st birthday party! :P

Me, my boyfriend, his mom and his step dad went to Bulacan. And everything didn't come out as I expected. I was thinking of a low profile celebration for his niece's birthday, actually. He's a one-year old after all. So I was really shocked to see tables and chairs out on their garden. But what really shocked me was my boyfriend made me meet his grandparent on his father's side who where living just a block away from his brother's house. Luckily for me, they were nice people, and his grandfather was currently in a laughing trip when we got there. Before we left, my boyfriend's grandma made him promise that he is going to take care of me.

So, back at the party, we ate spaghetti and fried chicken. Well, what do you expect, it's a children's party. I got real full, but I couldn't refuse the food that were served (my all-time favorite, Lumpiang Shanghai). There was ice cream, of course. And snacks, too. But they were for the children so I stopped myself. Ha ha. We got there at 1:30 in the afternoon and left at 5:00. For the whole time, I was with my boyfriend who (I think) was so afraid to leave me alone. He kept asking if I was bored, and I said that I was having a great time, and that's the truth. I don't know, but I was sleepy on the way back home, I slept for 30 minutes! It was just a one and a half-hour drive back, so I was shocked (again!) when my boyfriend's step dad asked me if it was okay that we were stopping somewhere to eat. We stopped at Kim Hiong's, a Chinese restaurant in Ongpin. I was real full so I didn't eat that much. Too bad, because the food were really delicious. After eating they drove me home.

And argh, I got so lonely again. I miss my boyfriend already. He sent me a text message saying that his step dad told him to not get me pregnant, yet. And I was like, "OMG! Now, where did that come from?" Ha ha.

I really thought I can do that everyday. Suffer from dizziness in riding a car, eat too much without worrying about my figure (What figure?), but be with my boyfriend for a very long time. That was 8 hours, man! The longest I had with him was 6 hours! So many firsts I experienced yesterday.

That was it. No, that was not it all. Of course, I keep some things between me and myself (and yeah, my boyfriend). *grins widely*

*** I finished The Lightning Thief in less than half of a day. *cheers* Next up: Sea of Monsters. They are by Rick Riordan. A must-read! ***

Too bad no one told him: you can't save a damsel if she loves her distress.

No one's going to save me from whatever I feel for him.Not love from another, not attention. Simply because I don't need any saving from. I know I'm still falling even after it's already past two years. And I know that no one will ever make me feel this way again, no one but him. It's not the stubborn part, it's my stupid side, the hopeful one, that keeps on believing we can do it. It's love on the rocks, but there's no telling what may still happen is there? We have our whole life ahead, and I see it irrevocably intertwined, enisled from any other life but ours. I wouldn't go planning my life with him at the first place if there was any other way that I could see myself with somebody else. And I know that that must mean something, if not everything.

I've been locked inside your heart-shaped box for weeks.

A day before Valentine's. Love is in the air, literally. And you would notice it really easily. Especially when people around you gets really mushy and things. Haha. I went to the grocery yesterday to find snacks to eat later at my boyfriend's house, and I overheard a guy saying, "I wish I'd be happy this Valentines." I would have been moved, as in really really moved. But then when I looked he was looking at me, dreamily. *gasp!* And I ran.

I hate this part right here, love that part right there.

When someone feels something that is out of hand, uncontrollable, or out of league, or in much simpler words - unimaginable, things get really shocking. Or creepy. Ugh. Especially if that someone is a friend of yours, or you "thought" that someone was a friend of yours, OR you were made believe that that someone is a friend of yours. I can't even find a word to describe how I feel. I don't even know if I should feel something!

Well, I think maybe he got challenged by the competition another friend posed but rather jokingly. But jokingly, or not jokingly, or even if there was no competition, he shouldn't have come up to me to tell me he really likes me, "at the least." It's bothering, really. How he could even feel that way when he...

Argh! I know I shouldn't make a big deal out of it or even a small tiny little deal out of it, but believe me, if you knew what he said, you'd be as shocked (or annoyed) as I am!

*breathes deeply*
*relaxes (a bit)*

"OR" count = 8! Ü (Haha, the word 'or' appeared 8 times up there!)

Listening to: Smells Like Teen Spirit
Next Up: Polly. Relaxing! *Lol*

My boyfriend invited me to go to his niece's (Kurt) birthday on February 17. Yey. Going out of town! It's not that far. But it is out of town anyway. We'll be going with his mother, whom I genuinely like very much. For how could someone age so gracefully?

Nothing left to talk about now. And I have to prepare for school. Hah. I don't even want to stand up.

It's always like this when I need to think of something.

An ordinary day, made extraordinarily special by the fact that I am not going to school 'for a reason'. *cheers* Yes, for a reason. :) I think I have sore eyes.

This is the first post, obviously. And I am suffering from what is usually known as the writer's block. Well, in my case, a blogger's block. I can't even think of a blog title.

A lot has been going around in school lately, applying to those 'happenings around' that I know of. We have to make 25 programs (but I think our professor said it's down to 20), to do a stage play to portray Noli Me Tangere, make an Ethical Analysis (a case study), to memorize "Land of Bondage, Land of the Free" for declamation, to watch yet another stage play entitled "Oedipus the King," and you guessed it, a reaction paper based on what we have watched. And if that wasn't enough, our professor in Presentation Skills in I.T. keeps reminding us that we have to be ready for an extemporaneous speech. Geez, it really is nice to take a break. *thankful for my sore eyes*

Last Saturday I started reading, and finished Breaking Dawn. It was really addicting, very much like my addiction to Harry Potter's 7th book. Looking to borrow "The Lighting Thief" from Keb, my classmate. *SPECIAL MENTION* Lol.

That's it for now. I'd be watching Gossip Girl until lunch time. :D